Quest for Meaning

Advice From Gen X to Gen Y

Finding one's meaning in life is never an easy task especially when previous generations infuse you with their ideologies and purport it law touting that anything outside its boundaries is weird and/or abnormal. 

According to the experts of TVO's The New Lost Generation with Steve Paikin, the newest generation, Gen Y will quest deeper and wider than any of its preceding generations for meaningful employment. Although it is not clearly decided, Gen Y was born sometime between the late 1970's to the early 2000's and is approximately 13 to 33 years of age. Unlike Gen X, Gen Y will be highly selective in their job searches and will not settle to take a job simply because it pays the bills. Furthermore, Gen Y will not allow big salaries or job security to dictate their employment or overall life decisions as have preceding Baby Boomers. Gen Y's constant need for communication will keep them closely connected with family and friends as well as their own personal interests and hobbies. Overall happiness will reign supreme over the need for lengthy commutes and long work hours. And in the process of finding meaning, it is presumed Gen Y will stumble and falter without patience and perseverance, move back into their parent's homes and create Internet businesses that will most likely fail within three months. Not a promising outlook if you ask me, and perhaps not the best advice considering it came primarily from Baby Boomers.

In my own search for meaning I've had over 250 jobs, six were careers and four were entrepreneurial. My first job required people skills, a lot of eye hand coordination, manual dexterity, basic knowledge of math, and a willingness to work odd hours. I was nine when my parents hired me to work in their Live Bait & Tackle Shop. Oftentimes I worked late, sometimes past midnight, catching worms in the fields or on the golf courses. Some days I was expected to wake with the birds to make the long commute to our store in an adjacent town. Yet often I found time in the middle of the day, when no one was looking, for a short siesta. I climbed into the back of my parent's van, closed the doors and allowed the summer's heat to dull me into a dead sleep. 

By the time I was 12 I had established my own business. I had the exclusive contract to sell horse manure to a neighbor for her flowerbeds at a 400% profit. Never once did I dictate the price or quantity of merchandise but allowed my client that privilege instead. Subsequently, I was quite successful in my first career. Unfortunately, future work for others was less promising.

Climbing the corporate ladder was never easy for me as corporate Baby Boomer executives predetermined the quality of my life with long hours, a lack of ongoing or enhancement training, low wages, and little room for advancement. When it came to being employed for others, I was only ever able to successfully negotiate one salary to my liking. My greatest financial successes arrived while in business for myself. Entrepreneurial endeavors enabled me to dictate a fair and reasonable wage. Of all the jobs I've had working for others, I've quit all but two. Corporate downsizing severed one job. Failure to commit severed another. Truthfully, I didn't like the job, cleaning offices, jail cells, courthouses and grade schools. Besides, at the time I was 19 and spending time with my boyfriend and friends was far more important.

When it comes to jobs I've done everything from washing dishes to waiting tables, bartender, housekeeping, painting and decorating, personal and group fitness trainer, school bus driver, professional driver, sales, retail management, advertising, writing, editing, public speaking, marketing, event planner, media relations and overall public relations. Yet nothing has been more rewarding than personal writing, which I might add hasn't earned me a penny. And therein lies my greatest conundrum, how to profit from first personal narrative.

It has been suggested by many baby boomers that I conform to traditional writing and stop trying to earn from non-conventional methods. And if money were the bottom line I would agree. But it’s not. Meaning is.

When it comes to writing, first person narrative provides the greatest meaning in my life. It is an opportunity to share, connect, and relate to and with others, and represents everything Gen Y is seeking in a meaningful career but will probably never find not so long as traditional Baby Boomers continue to define the who, what, where, when, why and how of work.

Meaning can be found in all those things you take seriously that are important to you and where you find yourself most useful. Tradition dictates that if you can't earn from those things that provide you greatest meaning, then do it as a hobby and settle for a less than meaningful career. Being a Gen X I have a different view.

My ex-husband is a Baby Boomer eight years my senior and while I did not recognize it at the time, I now see how our generational ideological differences contributed to the demise of our marriage. My ex is a workaholic whereas I need to earn money to pay the bills without sacrificing my personal interests, hobbies and downtime to achieve my goals. He has few hobbies. My whole life is a hobby. He’s religious. I’m spiritual. He doesn’t want others to succeed him. I promote others and encourage them to succeed beyond me. He’s black and white. I’m gray. He’s all about being served, hording money and the bottom line. I’m all about serving others, circulating money, and humanity. We are two opposing sides of the same knife that make up a double-edged sword. In the dynamics of our marriage, it seems our Gen Y daughter is the gray between our black and white. She wants the financial and material successes like her father and the freedom of deeper meaning like her mother. Unfortunately, traditional ideology dictates that we must let go of one thing in order to have another, which is a striking contrast to Gen X’s gray ideology that claims so long as you follow your passions the money will follow. Misplaced passions don’t guarantee financial success. Don’t be beguiled into thinking that just because you have a passion the money will follow. Instead, follow the combined advise of the Baby Boomers and Gen X, work hard AND smart in whatever has meaning for you. Furthermore, DON’T!

Don't give in to conformity!

·      No matter how difficult the path, you were born an original, don't become a copy. Find a way to make yourself, your product or your service acceptable to the masses without cloning. Your uniqueness is your greatest sales advantage.

Don't give up on your dreams!

·      Dreams often require lifelong commitments that will pit you against some of life’s most formidable obstacles and require great acts of courage, perseverance, tenacity, and grit. Dreams may oftentimes need to be modified or tailored for material consumption.

Don't quit just because you fail!

·      Failure is not a punishment. It is a mentor, a gift of learning for future opportunity and a chance to try again with greater wisdom and awareness. If you fail, figure out what you did wrong, what elements were missing, if timing factored into the equation, then try again with a more enlightened approach.

Don't let challenges defeat you!

·      Challenges reveal your greatest strengths and weaknesses and test your mental flexibility. Challenges point out needed resources, shortcomings, shortsightedness, and stubbornness. Let challenges fully expose you to yourself for optimal success.

Don't stop trying! 

·      Be resourceful. If one preferred method or choice is not working, seek out alternative methods and venues for providing your goods or services. Alter your approach. Create new venues if existing ones don’t meet your requirements. If you need further education or training, get it.

Don’t become your greatest obstacle!

·      Whenever you refuse a possibility or idea or whenever you put yourself down and convince yourself you can’t or aren’t worthy, you close yourself to present and future opportunity. Keep an open mind. Note everything and remember that which may not work today just might work tomorrow.

Don’t rush a thing before it’s time!

·      Allow life’s experiences their own place and time in your life. Go with the flow and don’t try to force a thing before it’s time lest you become your greatest obstacle. Temper your desires until the universe has cleared the path and presented circumstances for your most favorable outcome.

Don't allow another generation's ideas of failure and success determine yours!

·      In a society that values money and power above all else, it is essential you define your own interpretation of failure and success. Joy is often the greatest measure of failure and success and while happiness is momentarily, true success can be found on the path with the most happy moments.

Don't allow another generation's ideas of value determine yours!

·      Boomers will make you believe you are lazy if you don’t work 60+ hours a week because they value money, material goods and prestige. But you are a different generation destined for different experiences, causes and applications. Search yourself for all those things of value and live your values without shame or guilt.

Don't allow another generation's ideas of happiness determine yours!

·      One man’s trash is another man’s treasure. Happiness is not a thing to be judged but lived. Live out those things that harmlessly bring joy and comfort to your heart, mind and body.

Don't allow another generation's ideas of meaning determine yours!

·      While previous generations exert influence, meaning is subjective to individual preferences and choice. Only you can decide what is meaningful to you and why. There’s no need to justify it to anyone, not even yourself.

When in doubt, don’t.

·      Don’t put the advice or opinions of others above your own intuition. Intuition may not serve to please your immediate circle, but it also will never betray your true path. Trust, listen to and obey your intuition above everything else.

Don’t ignore the tradeoffs.

·      Everything in life has a trade off whereby you must surrender something for another. Therefore, know that if family provides meaning in your life, you may not want to work far from home. You may not want to work overtime. You may want longer vacations, etc. Therefore, the tradeoff may involve earning less. But if living a lavish lifestyle also has meaning then you might find yourself in conflict until you sort out which of the two provides the greatest meaning in your life.

Resources:

Pallavi Gogoi, Welcome to the Gen Y Workplace, Business Week, May 4, 2005 http://www.businessweek.com/bwdaily/dnflash/may2005/nf2005054_4640_db_083.htm

The Agenda with Steve Paikin, The New Lost Generation, January 26, 2010 http://www.tvo.org/cfmx/tvoorg/theagenda/