Stupid & Funny News: Pigeon's to go on 'the pill'

On a recent visit to Stamford, Princess Anne and her daughter Zara were the unfortunate recipients of pigeon poo on the royal personages. Councilman Clem Walden was embarassed on behalf of his town and has a cunning plan to reduce the pigeon population so that future royal visits won’t be ruined by flying pigeon poo.

His plan involves putting pellets laced with ‘OvoControl P’ in rooftop feeders dotted around the town. OvoControl P interferes with egg development, and Mr Walden believes the use of the drug could halve the local pigeon population by 2012. He came up with the idea after hearing of its success in America. The pigeon pill has proved particularly successful on the boulevards of Hollywood.

“The pigeon problem in Stamford has got worse and worse over the last five or six years,” he said. “We have been getting lots of complaints about the mess they are making and it has now got to the extent where it is uncontrollable”. Mr Walden went on: “I heard about the pigeon pill and I think it’s a good idea - provided only the pigeons get hold of it”.

That’s right Mr Walden, what if unsuspecting kiddies climb up on the rooftops of Stamford and eat the pellets? Food for thought there I think…

The town council has yet to make a decision on the issue and a number of Mr Walden’s colleagues have expressed concern about the legality of using the drug in Britain. There is also the issue of acquiring supplies but maybe they could do a deal with the pigeon who’s in prison in Bosnia; he seems to have contacts that could prove useful.